i sympathized with him a lot felt bad for him F

Definitely. I mean he does embody a lot of negative traits, but that's what makes him so appealing. I'm probably projecting but given the circumstances he was put in, his reaction/behavior was irrational but justified. He was a depressed kid from a dysfunctional family thrust into the throes of war(not sure what to call it but he did see a lot of death, probably experienced similar traumas), he COULD have been braver, he COULD have been kinder, but the reality of the situation doesn't always allow it. Shinji's character is riddled with flaws that didn't magically disappear because the situation called for it, and I respect the team behind NGE for not praising/congratulating (unless...?) him for said flaws because they're just that: flaws.

They really presented him for what he was; a depressed, self-loathing coward with major daddy issues who was hyper-aware of how messed up he was but never took the steps to change (in a way he's like the anti-deku, instead of overcoming his cowardice he chooses to dwell in it).

I do not think he is badly written. I just hate him.In fact I think he is a pretty unique and interesting char. AND YET I still hate him.

I never hated Shinji. I was aware of the amount of hate he got before watching the show so when i watched it, i expected him to be a much worse character.
Actually, i think he's well written... even relatable..